Why I don’t eat with radicals and sinners

I used to be involved in GOP politics and associated with people who said the government should just shoot drunk drivers. I might call these opinions “detestable,” but you should demand to know if I also “condemn” them, because obviously, I’d imbibe these views just by sitting in the same room with people who held them.

When I was a teen, I attended multiple conferences featuring a speaker who believes speed limits should be illegal and that we should we execute anyone irresponsible enough to drive too fast and commit vehicular homicide. I may not have heard him say this, but I must believe it too.

Let’s not forget that in college, an acquaintance once hauled me to a John Birch Society meeting and another friend once gave a presentation saying women had inferior leadership skills. We’re friends so I agree with everything he says, even if he’s contradicting everything I say or write or believe in.

I always agree with my pastor. I would never attend a church where anyone expressed views that diverged from my own — not even if I had a deep connection or personal history with the people who went there, too.

I’ve known conspiracy theorists, so I am one. My neighbors have been known to draw guns over irrigation disputes. I live next to them, so that means I condone their behavior.

When I try to accomplish something good, I refuse to work with anyone who has a shady past. I scrupulously screen my dinner invitations and only accept invites from people whose political views match mine. I refuse to eat with people who like to raise taxes and sinners.

Because one can’t be too careful. Political and religious views are well, like HIV: highly contagious, easily passed through a cough or a sneeze or charity board meeting or sermon.


~ by stultiloquence on April 21, 2008.

8 Responses to “Why I don’t eat with radicals and sinners”

  1. my word, woman, you are brilliant.

  2. Gees, you sound like a Lutheran.

  3. There was a Futurama episode where Bender gets religion.

  4. People who actually condone that you take on the behavior you’re satirizing must then be very proud to consider themselves condonable – good influences. You address the idea that one should or should not avoid certain people just because some of their ideas don’t match up with yours. I’m curious as to what you think about two other possibilities:
    1. What about people who are totally inverse to you, the people who do things you might consider incredibly evil and do them willingly?
    2. What about spending most or all of your “social” time with people who are fundamentally antithetical, at least religiously, to you?

    I actually do the second of those.

  5. let me just say that your wit is smoking hot and I love you.

  6. For anyone who might not quite get it, I wrote this in response to the flap over Obama’s connection to William Ayers. Click on the links for the story.

  7. That’s been a lovely way of communicating, I think. Subtle and indirect, without specifically mentioning arguable material, though you still address the issues very well.

  8. ooooh, snap.
    i agree with abby. your intellectual and rhetorical hotness is astounding.

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