Save the Blonde

Russia Today reports that a computer accessories company is manufacturing a computer keyboard tastelessly tailor-made for blondes. The manufacturer has snarkily labelled the space bar “The longest key,” the Enter key “The Biggest,” and the Esc key “No!

I stand with feminist and brunette Maria Arbatova, who demands, “What’s next? A keyboard for Jews? A keyboard for blacks? A keyboard for deaf-mutes?” Perhaps it’s time to stop equating “blonde” and “bimbo” and start questioning the stereotypes that have held blondes in sex-symbol subjection since cavegirls evolved flaxen locks to compete for the attention of chauvinist cavemen billions of years ago.

Studies indicate that people label platinum blondes as dumb. Could this be why, despite World Health Organization denials, natural blondes are heading towards extinction? Research is lacking. Discrimination is real.

Hungarian blondes have called on their government to end discrimination: “People are banned from discriminating against Jews, or blacks, so why not grant blondes the same protection?” Until blondes worldwide ask the same question, the dream that one day our endangered children will be judged not by the color of their hair but by the content of their character, is just that — an empty dream.


~ by stultiloquence on November 8, 2007.

4 Responses to “Save the Blonde”

  1. It’s about as dumb as making a blonde bimbo doll an ideal for feminine beauty, but that image did prevail amongst most little girls, didn’t it? Marilyn Monroe is a bad example to use in some of those articles, she wasn’t a natural blonde, and her dumb-play was upholding stereotype only to service and audience’s appetite.

    I wouldn’t put it in the same category as the plight of Jews, blacks and deaf-mutes.

  2. Great writing. You are very gifted and funny. I will keep your blog bookmarked, but beware, if it’s not updated at least once every two weeks then I delete it. There are just too many people to keep up with these days. sigh….

    Isn’t our world so vain!

  3. I am privileged to have one of the world’s last redheads (who are becoming extinct much more dangerously than even blondes and are at least equally maligned) as the closest of my friends.

  4. […] skinny girls have stupid babies My already-pitifully-starved self-esteem shrunk to nothing today when I saw the results of a study that chirps, “Curvy women are […]

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