Petitions, Pepper Spray, and Saudi Girl Power

There is more than one way to fight female oppression. One way is to form women’s rights groups with names like the Committee of Demanders of Women’s Right to Drive Cars. The other way is to pepper-spray virtue police. And Saudi Arabian women are fighting both ways.

On September 24, an Arabic newspaper sniffed that two Saudi girls brutally attacked members of the portentous Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice. These men had politely asked the girls to change their “inappropriate clothing,” but the girls were so hell-bent on flaunting their ankles and wrists that they “verbally abused” the CPVPV men. Then one inappropriately-dressed female whipped out her pepper spray. The other inappropriately-clad girl recorded the altercation on her contraband cell phone “while continuing to hurl insults.” Unable to restrain the two girls on their own, the CPVPV men called for police reinforcements, hauled the girls in and made them apologize. (Thank Allah!)

The Committee of Demanders of Women’s Right to Drive Cars is adopting gentler, more womanly methods. They are politely petitioning the government for a “right that has been delayed for too long.” Obviously Saudi women don’t drive, or driving would not have this seductive allure. Saudi women probably think that driving means freedom and making out with hot bearded men in back seats, but really driving (in my own experience) means steering into other cars, paying for the cars that I crumple, and crying to get out of tickets. I think I may form a Committee of Demanders of Women’s Right to Chauffeurs.

Still, Saudi women kick CPVPV butt with their CDWRDC and their contraband cell phones and their pepper spray. No wonder the Very Grand Mufti is afraid to put them behind the wheels of 2000 pound erratically-aimed Mini Coopers. They’d probably take over the world.


~ by stultiloquence on September 27, 2007.

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